In an ideal world, “family” would be made up of people that are always supportive – a group of people that you always get along with and you know you can depend on. However, as most of us know all too well, this is not an ideal world! How can you deal with family drama, especially when you have your own issues to deal with? Here are some tips for doing just that.
Let it go
You may want to help the difficult family member to improve their behavior – you probably have the best intentions. However, the truth is that some people don’t want to change. Maybe they enjoy being the way they are (even if they don’t seem very happy), or maybe how they act is so entrenched in their personality that they don’t even see anything wrong. For your sake it is best just to accept them and to avoid trying to “fix” them, unless they ask for your help and you can see that they are really trying to change for the better.
Some people thrive on drama. When you really look at them, you can see that many of the problems they have they have created themselves. But don’t get sucked into it. Try to avoid arguing so as not to play into their need for drama, but do assert yourself. If an argument reaches a point where nothing is getting resolved and the family member is just fighting with you for the sake of fighting, stop interacting with them.
Take care of yourself
While it is very tempting to allow a family member to have or say whatever they want just to keep the peace, make sure you know what your boundaries are and then enforce them. You deserve to have your peace, as well. You can be respectful without giving them everything they want (which usually won’t appease them, anyway).