A person you love is struggling with addiction, but they don’t think they need help. They want to take care of it on their own, or they simply deny that they have a problem at all. When a loved one doesn’t want to enter treatment, why they are resistant? For some, admitting that they have a problem implies they are willing to do something about it. Some resist treatment because they’re concerned how committing time for residential, or even outpatient care, would effect other areas of their lives, such as employment, academics, childcare and family needs, finances, or other concerns. They may worry how going to treatment will effect their relationships. They may be afraid of what others will think of them. They want to avoid stigmas around addiction. They may wrestle with shame, regret, and fear. Denial is a quick solution to avoid those powerful emotions. When a loved one doesn’t want to enter treatment, there are steps you can take to help them and help yourself.
Say what you mean and mean what you say
When you’re ready, tell the your loved one that you love them, you’re concerned, and that you are already to help. Be as clear as possible on what you are, and are not, willing to do. Avoid guilt trips, idle threats, and ultimatums. If you’ve set up a consequence, follow through with it.
Hold onto your money
If your loved one is struggling with alcohol or drugs, they may ask for financial assistance. This is a sensitive and, sometimes, risky engagement. He may be juggling some financial wreckage due to substance abuse. He forgot to make a payment, or he simply doesn’t have money to see through a responsibility, such as rent or a car payment. If you are concerned that the money you offer would go to drugs or alcohol (and it might), avoid giving him money. If you would like to support his needs, pay his landlord, or other lender, directly. If he says he needs gasoline, go with him. If he needs groceries, buy them for him yourself.
Get help for yourself
Watching someone you love make choices that harm himself is painful and exhausting. You feel worn out, taken advantage of, and frightened. Find a therapist to help you walk through this. Practice self-care. Eat well, get some sleep, and take care of your own needs first.
Do your research
Read up on what your loved one might be feeling and going through. You’ll learn signs to look for that their physical or mental health may be compromised. Read articles written by others who have struggled with addiction. What is it like to be addicted to a substance? What is withdrawal like? Gather information on treatment options for addiction.
When a loved one doesn’t want to enter treatment, call Wasatch Crest. We understand addiction and family dynamics, and the weight it bears on relationships, health, and social systems, and partnerships. Recovery from addiction to drugs and alcohol is possible. When a loved one doesn’t want to enter treatment – call Wasatch Crest. We can help.
